Once upon a time two days ago, I was paid, but not with money, because even if I was it would all be taxed away by the semi socialism of the Federal Republic of Germany (Europe in general for that matter). Because honestly what is a payday when up to 45% of your salary is taken away on top of 20% for social welfare and healthcare?? Maybe enough left over to fly to America.
Back to the story. So I was paid...with a visit from everyone's favorite insect, the mosquito. Now I've had a lot of success killing these pests. Slaying over 5 mosquito's since arriving against only 4 bites, I fancy myself a Champion Slayer of Mosquitos (CSM). Striking mosquitos with superb precision, supreme accuracy and deadly force...
That is until I was greeted by Mosquito number 6 (M6). M6 was smarter, faster and better than my previous opponents. Small, nimble and agile, M6 rarely afforded me more than one attempt at every opporunity (offered sparsely). M6 would fly high and above to an area unreachable by my devastating arms.
I often stayed awake until 2am before giving up on trying to slay M6. And when I did sleep, M6 would come down to bite me. 8 times over the course of 2 nights. I was being tortured by itchiness, a lack of sleep and extreme frustration, often cursing into the night for failing to eliminate M6.
M6 had the upperhand, but the fight was far from finished. Dealing with M6 required a new strategy and that came in the form of containment instead of eradication. Cleverly I shaped a container out of my ice cream bar box. I went to sleep knowing that one last opportunity was all I needed. And it came, M6 bit my foot while sleeping and I awoke, sprining into action.
Lights on. Box in hand. Now where was M6? Scanning the room quickly but completely, I located M6 on the dresser. Probably just digesting my sweet sweet blood, I crept up and in one fell swoop captured M6 in the box. Now I dont know if M6 is dead or alive, but I'm in no rush to check (its a paper box, not tupperware).
Vengeance never tasted so...quite like my blood, which would be sweet because mosquitos love it, but never actually tried it on purpose because I'm not a vampire or some kind of freak, wow relax. Although its really hard because I'm still really itchy.
cliff notes: Contained a mosquito!
